Awakening

It is He who calls your souls back by night, knowing what you have done by day, then raises you up again in the daytime until your fixed term is fulfilled. It is to Him that you will return in the end, and He will tell you what you have done. [Q 6:60]

Sleep is an interesting phenomenon.

Some will doze off the moment their head hits the pillow while others will need to count sheep to fall asleep. I am one of those who suffer from both and usually cannot recall how and when I actually doze off into dreamland. Perhaps it is not for humans to know when our souls return to Him at night.

Beyond the physical, many strange things happen during our sleep. Depending on the state of mind, one may reveal secrets while asleep. I used to do maths while sleeping during my computing and software engineering days much to the concern and perhaps the inconvenience to my wife.

For a while now I am in search of answers on awakening rather than sleeping, per se.

How do we do our sleep (or “control” it) so that we are able to wake up at a predetermined time (and yes, I know we can rely on the alarm of the clocks – notice the plural)?

And certainly with His permission for we only continue to wake up until we meet death at the appointed time.

Why is it that when there is a place to go or a meeting to attend we are able to tune and time our body and mind to wake up early so that we will not be late or miss the taxi to the airport?

Why is it that when it’s the first day of school (and tomorrow is the beginning of the new school term) we are able to wake up in the early hours to get everything done, including breakfast, before waking the kids up for prayers and school?

Why is it that when we attend a sleepover programme in a mosque, we are able to wake up during the last hours of the night to do our Tahajjud prayers?

I am envious of those who are able to wake up for their tahajjud and spend time with their mathurat after Fajr prayers. I also admire those (Pak Azyumardi and Br Tariq Ramadan, included) who contemplate and write books in the early hours after their prayers.

Why is it that our waking-up is not much of an awakening but at best a struggle between being horizontal and vertical?

Is it a case of not consistently practicing and internalizing the do’a the Prophet taught us, before sleeping and upon waking-up as well the reminder of the three knots as in the Hadith reported in Bukhari and Muslim?

I crave a good night's sleep but I yearn to be the first to wake-up to call the morning azan. And every waking-up is a new awakening for the soul, mind and body.

There is still much to be desired before aspiring to be a warrior in the day and a monk in the night.

O Allah, I surrender myself to You and turn my face towards You, and entrust myself to You ….

….. zzzzz